Wife makes my dream come true

The story of a crossdresser whose wife makes her dream come true.

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Story Credit: Jinal

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I had a fantasy for dressing up since puberty hit me. I wanted to crossdress even before I knew what it meant. I always dreamt of wearing sexy feminine clothes. I could never try any female clothes at that time though, but the curiosity in me never died.

When I started dating my wife, I once gathered the courage and told her my fantasy. I am sure she did not expect that and was rather surprised by the fantasy, but she said she will help me live it once and if she found it comfortable, we will see where can we take it further. Once while we were making out, she took off her bra and asked me to try it on. I was really excited and tried it on myself. While I had mixed feelings of excitement and embarrassment, she could not stop from giving the disgusted look. I took it off immediately and told her I did not like the idea, just to save her from giving the difficult message that she did not like it.

I did not discuss that idea with her for next 10 years. We got married and led a very happy life. But the thoughts of wearing feminine clothes never went away. In fact living with her and looking at her in the sexy clothes from time to time increased the desire of wearing her clothes. I had even tried her clothes in her absence. But everytime I thought of bringing that topic, that looks on her face when she saw me reminded me of not doing it.

Things did not change for 10 years. But then one incident changed my entire life. My wife had gone out of town for 10 days. She wanted me to buy her a gift when she came back. I jokingly said that I can gift her sexy lingerie if she wants (now I never bought lingerie for her before and so this was new for both of us). I thought she will not like the idea, but she infact encouraged me to buy for her.

She loved my choices and we had one of the best sex that night. And so it was decided that only I will buy lingerie for her from there on. She started to discuss her likes and dislikes with me about her clothes. She would wear them and explain me what exactly does she like in it and what is not comfortable.

I was getting the two best things – the sex life got better and I could see her in my choices of lingerie;

I started getting more daring with my choices and the sluttiness in each of my selection started increasing. Once the bra that I bought for was really slutty and gave her a look of a hooker. It was really a small one and hardly covered anything. She would otherwise always try the clothes that I would select but this time she got really agitated. She threw it away and asked me not to bring such clothes for her. I really wanted her to try it on and started requesting her to atleast try it once. “You can be my whore for one night right?” I told her. Thinking that she might like the idea.

Instead, she got even angrier with that and told me “Why dont you become a whore for a night then? I have had enough of parading for you. Why dont you try to dress up for me once?”

I had no idea whether it was her anger speaking or was she really suggesting that. I was not even sure whether she remembered by fantasy.

While I was in my thoughts, she asked me again “I am waiting. Try it on and show me.”This time the looks on her face suggested I should actually try it.

I started removing my clothes to try the bra. removed my shirt and then started removing my shorts. She said “Wow, getting naked just to try on a bra, you really are my whore”.

I needed no further encouragement. My dick was eagerly waiting to get free. I got naked and put on the bra. Now I am really hairy and rarely shave, so I am sure I would be looking ridiculous. But this time her expressions were different. She was eyeing me with lust.

As soon as I wore the bra, she went to her wardrobe and took out some other clothes. First of all,
she gave me a pair of pads from one of her other bra. She also gave me thongs to wear with it. Now I
had tried her panties but never tried her thongs. I asked whether I can wear my boxers below.

“Did I ask your opinion? Just do as I say” Suddenly the roleplaying game was turning from her being the hooker to me being her submissive lesbian partner.

I quietly wore the thongs. It did not cover anything. My dick was too big to hide behind the small help and the material was causing irritation in my ass. Looking at my discomfort, she suddenly pulled me towards herself and told me “Now you will understand what I go through to entertain you.” and then whispered “And looking at your dick, I am sure you are enjoying it more than me”.

With that she went and sat on the bed. I was too shocked to move. She got comfortable and called me nearer “Come here honey. Lets see what have you got there”

“Sure mam” I was not sure why I called her mam. I simply followed what I was asked to do.

“Yes, ‘mam’ would be nice. I like you calling me mam, dressed up like that” and with that she pulled me nearer and gave me a long kiss. Her fingers started exploring my entire body. She squeezed my ass and bite my lips at the same time. All I could manage was a soft moan.

Finally I gathered some sense and realised that she was still fully clothed. I tried unbuttoning her shirt, but she stopped me right there with a firm grip on my hand.

“Did I tell you to remove my clothes? Don’t act smart missy, it might not be good for you” She said with a stern look on her face. I did not dare to do anything that she did not want from there on.

She pushed me on the bed and started kissing me all over my body. She started kissing and sucking my fake boobs as well. The feeling of making love to her as a girl was overwhelming. I was enjoying every kiss of her and letting out moans.

“My missy is liking it I think. Do you like being my girl?” “Hmmm”
“You will have to say it, missy” “Yes I love being your missy”
As soon as I said that, she bit me on my chest just above my bra, as if biting my boobs. I was actually feeling like being a girl and getting turned on by her playing with my boobs.

Then she pulled the thongs aside and started kissing my dick. That caused the thongs to go inside my ass and made it even more uncomfortable for me. I tried adjusting it but she stopped me.

“Didn’t I tell you not to do anything without my permission? I want my missy to enjoy a little penetration in her ass too”

“Ok mam”

She started kissing my dick and taking it in her mouth. She had never taken my dick in her mouth without condom earlier, but the domination over me probably made her do it for the first time. She deliberately pulled the thongs along with sucking my dick. I started to enjoy the feeling in my ass and

“Don’t just lie there missy, your boobs need your attention. Press them for me.”

I did as I was told. Started squeezing my boobs and enjoyed getting sucked. I could not hold for longer and came rather quickly that day.

Once I was done, she came on top of me and hugged me tightly. I tried to move away after a while, to change the clothes.

“Where do you think you are going missy?”

“I thought I will change the clothes before sleeping”

“Did I ask you to change? Didn’t I tell you to do only what is told to you?” She said with a smile and gave me another hug. “I want you to be my girl for entire night. And I know you like it to. So be my cute little whore for the night and sleep like this”

I slept in those clothes for entire night with her teasing me from time to time. She would often woke up and press my boobs or my dick. I must say it was an experience which was better than any other earlier experience. I knew I would enjoy women’s clothes but never knew I would enjoy it so much.

Next day started as usual. We got ready and went to work. I was getting confused whether it was for a night or it may continue and just about then, I got a text from her saying “From now on, you can buy my lingerie and I will buy yours”.

And that is how it started. I would buy sexy lingerie for her and she would wear it for me. She would sometimes buy lingerie for me and make me her missy for that night.

I started shaving my body to look and feel more like a girl. I usually wear full sleeves shirts to work and hence no one in the office could notice the missing hairs. I had to wear shirts and trousers even when I was with friends to hide my shaved arms and legs.

She would assume the dominant position while I would be the girl. I enjoyed being the submissive girl in the relationship.

Then one day, she texted me saying “I have changed the trend a little. I have bought gifts for both of us for tonight.”.

I thought she would have bought lingerie for both of us that day. I went home early that day and started preparing for the night. I took a proper bath and shaved my face, arms and legs. I wore her bathrobe and came out of the bathroom when she entered the room.

“Wow, my missy is too eager for the night” She came close and gave me a kiss. Her dominance became very obvious with the way she kissed me. As such I knew how she behaves but something looked different that day. She was behaving more bossy than ever.

“Prepare the dinner while I get ready. Don’t take too much time. And no need to wear clothes”

I did as I was told. The anticipation for the night was too exciting for me. She came down for dinner after sometime. I was expecting her to wear something special, but she was wearing a normal shirt and pyjama for the night. I was not able to understand the selection of clothes but had understood by then not to question her anything.

Our game of dominance never left our bedroom, but that day, she was behaving bossy even in the kitchen for the first time. When we were done with the dinner, she said “Do the dishes and come upstairs missy. Don’t be late, you will not like the consequences” By saying that she gave me a kiss, squeezed my dick and went upstairs.

When I went upstairs, my gift was lying on my bed. The sluttiest possible bra with matching thongs. She was sitting on the working desk as if least interest in me. She asked me to get inside the bathroom and get ready. I went inside and put on my pads along with the bra and thongs. I had learnt how to apply a little make up by then and decided to try it on. Once done, I saw myself in the mirror and saw the sexiest version of me possible.

I went out and saw that she was still on the working desk, reading a magazine. As soon as she saw me, a smile came on her face, but she soon changed her expressions and called me near her.

“Come and sit here missy” She asked me to sit on her lap. “May I ask mam when will she wear her gift for the night?”
“You have no right to ask anything missy, but for your information I am already wearing it”

I sensed that something was odd and that she had planned the entire night. So I just went with the flow. I went and sat on her lap. She started talking to me while moving her hands on my bare back and thighs.

“You know missy, as much as I like being the dominant person in the relationship, I do not see myself as a lesbian. I think there is a need of a man in our relation”.

This shocked me to the core. While I loved dressing up, I was not gay and never wanted to be with a guy.

“But honey I don’t think I will be comfortable with that. This dressing up is only for you. I do not want anyone else to know it. A man would be the last person I would want to know.”

“Did I ask your choice missy?” and with that she squeezed my boobs. “I have invited a man tonight and you are the slut who will entertain him”

Now I was getting really scared. I gave her a kiss and told her with a request “Please mam. I do not want anyone else in the room. Please don’t make me do that.”

“Who said there will be someone else, missy?” And with that she took my hand in hers and guided it to her crotch. It was then that I felt a big strap on. That was the special gift for her for the night. She had already worn it while getting ready.

“I want to be the man in the relationship. Please be my bitch for the night. I love making you my bitch” She said kissing me and caressing my boobs.

I was not sure how to react. I had never thought of this scenario. But then I wanted to be a part of her fantasy as she had been part of mine. So I simply went with the flow.

“So, do this man have a name?” I said with a smile and kissing her back. “Its master for you, bitch” She bit my lips
“Ok master”

She made me stand up and turn. She gave two playful slaps on my butts. I wiggled my butts for her to enjoy the view. She then stood up and ordered

“Help me take out my clothes bitch. I need to get relaxed”.

I took out all her clothes and then I saw it. An 8 inch dildo with thickness even more than mine. Looking at my face, she understood what was going on in my mind. “It wont hurt if you make love to

it” She said, pushing me on my knees.

Reluctantly, I went down on my knees and started kissing the dildo. I held it with my hands and started taking the tip in my mouth. It was then that I realised that it was a two way dildo and a part of it was inside her as well. Her juices were already flowing and the smell made me lusty.

I forgot the reluctance and started enjoying it. I slowly took it in my mouth and started sucking it.

“I knew a slut like you would be a natural sucker” She said with a smile. I smiled back. I knew I had become the girl in the relationship. And more than that, she was the man now.

She pulled me up and pushed me on the bed, almost throwing me. She started kissing me passionately all over, all the time talking to me like a girl.

After exploring my entire body, she removed my thong and made me sleep on my chest. She slowly came near my ears and whispered “Ready to lose your virginity to your master, bitch?”

I had never thought of getting pegged, but it seemed very natural in that moment. “Yes master. Fuck me please”
“That’s like my girl. I knew you would like it.”

She applied some lube on my ass and slowly inserted the dildo. It was too much at first for me, but she really took it slow for me. After a couple of strokes, I started to enjoy it and my body got relaxed. Just when I was starting to enjoy, she stopped.

“What happened, master?” I asked

“I think my bitch is liking it” “Yes I am”
“In that case you need to ask for it if you want more”

“Please fuck me master. Make me your bitch. I want you to fuck my ass. Please” “With pleasure, bitch”

And the next stroke was not gentle. The pain and pleasure took me in a different world. I lost the
track of the time how long she fucked me. I never imagined cumming while getting my ass fucked. My hands naturally started caressing my boobs for pleasure. She came after a long time of fucking and then simply fell on me and slept. We slept there for a while before coming to senses. As soon as she woke up, she fucked me again, without even asking me. I felt like her fuck toy, which was making the sex more pleasurable for me as well.

And that night changed everything. From there on, we have never made sex as lesbians. It is either her as a girl or me as her bitch. She has started becoming dominant even when she is the girl in the room. And I am not complaining about it.

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A Conversation

Talking about our unusual habit to our wife is not an easy thing to do.

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Note: Dear ladies, this is my honest attempt to share my experience after my wedding through this story. This story is a blend of a little fiction and a bit of my real experience. It is my sincere hope that you would like it. Please don’t forget to comment and share your views if you liked this story.

– Anupama

“I don’t understand this, Kabir. Why would you be interested in wearing women’s clothes? Clothes are only clothes. They are meant to cover your body. That’s all. Then, why would you want to wear women’s clothes?”, my new wife asked me when I told her about my unusual habit of occasionally dressing up in women’s clothes. She was not arguing with me, but she was anxious. Anxious because this was really confusing for her. It is not easy for any woman to hear that her husband loves to dress like a woman. And it wasn’t easy for my wife either.

“I don’t know how to explain this to you, Tanu. I don’t even know if I am even capable of explaining it.”, I was being honest with her. “And this might take a long time before you could even get an idea about how I feel. This may take days or even months for you to truly understand.”, I said to her trying to calm down her confused mind.

“I am in no rush, Tanu. We will take our time.”, I further said. I myself was going through a turmoil in my heart. I don’t even know if it was the right thing to tell Tanu about my desires so soon in this marriage.

“But at least try once to explain it to me, Kabir.”, she had tears in her eyes. My own heart felt a churning inside as I saw tears in the eyes of my simple and loving wife. She wasn’t crying at her luck; she was crying because she wanted to understand her husband. How was I supposed to explain something to her which I haven’t understood myself? How could I explain my desires to her when the world’s medical experts don’t know the reason behind it?

I hugged her in my helplessness, and caressed her hair with my fingers, and said to her, “Alright. I will give it a try. I don’t know if I will be able to explain everything.” I paused. “But before that, I need a promise from you Tanu.”

She held my hand in her hands to convey that she is with me in this. “Please promise that you won’t judge me, and you will continue to respect me the way you did before today… Because I am nothing if I lose respect in your eyes. Also, please never forget that I love you, no matter what the circumstances are.”, I said.

She wiped her tears with her hands, and tried to smile a little. “I promise you Kabir. I really want to understand you. I am going to respect you no matter what.”, she said. I smiled at my innocent wife. She was not realizing how difficult it would be for her to keep this promise.

I don’t know if Tanu believed in my love for her, but what she just said now, told me that she definitely loves me a lot. Otherwise, it was not possible for any woman to say what she just said. She is young, and still she exhibited maturity and patience that takes years for someone to learn.

Speaking about me, this was probably the most difficult thing to talk about my own personality. But I had to tell her something. This is such a topic that cannot be kept hanging for later when the subject has been broached.

I touched my wife’s arm which was adorned with a beautiful blouse that fit her snugly. I said to her, “Do you feel how your blouse hugs your skin perfectly?”

Tanu was not expecting such a question out of nowhere. She looked perplexed at me. “Have you ever seen any man wear such snug fitting clothes?”, I clarified a little.

Tanu shook her head in no. She thought for a while and said, “But there are clothes like sarees, skirts, and a few salwars designs that are very loose fitting as well.” She had a point.

“Hmm… true. So, have you seen any clothes for men that are free flowing like sarees or lehenga?”, I said. May be I was too quick to respond to her comment. I thought for a while and I asked her, “Don’t you like handling your saree or your salwar’s dupatta?”

“Yes, I like doing that. Kabir, to be honest, I never thought about it.”, Tanu said. “You know I like handling my saree especially in front of you. Your eyes twinkle every time I do something like that.”, she said laughing gently. I smiled with her too. “I really like watching you do that!”, I said being a typical Indian husband.

I felt a little relaxed seeing how she smiled and laughed. And then, she started looking down towards her lap. May be she was thinking something. The way she was playing with her bangles in her hand, it was clear that she was hesitating to express her thoughts.

“Ok. But you know, I didn’t like managing my saree before our wedding. May be it was because it used to get unwanted attention from men. And at times, when I am busy doing chores, I don’t like to manage my clothes in those times … I think I have learnt how to manage my salwar’s dupatta, but I am still learning to handle my saree when I am in the kitchen with your mom.”

“Kabir. I am unable to understand what are you trying to say? Do you like women’s clothes because they are tight fit, or because they are loose and free flowing?”, Tanu asked me trying to bring us back to the original discussion.

I knew it was a tough question to ask for her. I would be surprised if she really wanted to know which clothes I would like to wear myself. So, I just smiled without answering her.

“Listen. Can you answer this for me? Count in your head how much variety girls have when it comes to clothes, and then compare it with the number of option boys have.”, I said. And she started looking at the roof as if trying to think about what I asked. She really didn’t need to. She already knew the answer.

“Yes. Boys don’t have many options.”, she said.

“What about the colors?”, I asked again.

“Hmm… I don’t think boys will look good in colors that women wear. Women’s clothes can be too colorful for them.”, she said thinking out loud.

“Ok. So what about hair styles, jewelry, makeup? Who has these options?”, I asked.

“Of course, with girls. I don’t think boys would want to deal with that.”, she said.

“How do you know that boys don’t want that? Not long ago, men used to wear earrings. Before that in the era of kings, men would wear a lot of jewelry. And even before that, there was not much difference between the way men and women would dress.”, I said. This made her really think hard about why she feels that men wouldn’t want to do any of the things I mentioned earlier.

“I think the difference today exists because women love to appear beautiful.”, she said with all the honesty in her heart.

“And boys don’t want to appear beautiful or handsome?”, I said in a low voice and turned quiet. She turned quiet too. Probably, she was beginning to understand that the boys were never given a choice in their lives to look beautiful.

“What do you want to say, Kabir?”, Tanu asked after a long pause. She already knew what I wanted to say, but probably it was too soon for her to truly understand.

“Not much, Tanu. Not much. All I am saying is there is a huge difference between women’s clothes and men’s clothes.”

Once again, there was silence between us. But I was really thankful that Tanu didn’t say anything that would make me feel bad about me.

That silence was getting unbearable for both of us. Tanu broke that silence. “Do you know when we were kids, my younger brother would wear nail polish and mehendi on his hands? He used to appear so happy whenever my mom would apply nail polish on his small finger nails. But he doesn’t do that anymore.” And then she got closer to me and put her head over my chest. She held my hand and said, “If this society had not taught him that nail polish is meant for girls and not for boys, may be he would still feel happy to get his nails painted.”

It seemed like Tanu was finally getting the gist of how I feel. But she had been taught for years that this is how boys live and this is how girls live … it is not easy for anyone to forget that easily. We both need to proceed with lots of patience and understanding in our hearts.

Sometimes I feel if this society had not created rules of dressing and living for boys and girls, would I still have made a profile with a girl’s name on Facebook?

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कुछ बातें

शादी के बाद पति और पत्नी के बीच की वो बात जिससे हर क्रॉसड्रेसर घबराता है.

कृपया ऊपर दिए हुए स्टार रेटिंग का उपयोग कर कहानी को रेट करे!


नोट: प्रिय सहेलियों, इस कहानी के माध्यम से ये मेरा एक प्रयास है कि मैं अपनी शादी के बाद का अपना अनुभव आप लोगो के साथ बाँट सकू … इस कहानी में थोड़ी वास्तविकता और थोड़ी काल्पनिकता भी. मेरी दिल से ख्वाहिश है कि ये कहानी आपको पसंद आये. यदि मेरे प्रयास में मैं सफल रही तो कृपया अपने कमेंट और विचार ज़रूर शेयर करे.

– अनुपमा

“मुझे समझ नहीं आता कबीर कि आखिर तुम्हे औरतों के कपड़ो में क्या दिलचस्पी है? कपडे तो बस कपडे होते है… तन को ढंकने के लिए बस. फिर तुम औरतों के कपडे क्यों पहनना चाहते हो?”, मेरी नयी नवेली पत्नी ने मुझसे पूछा जब मैंने शादी के कुछ दिनों बार उसे अपनी क्रॉसड्रेसिंग के बारे में बताया. वो ये सवाल गुस्से में नहीं पूछ रही थी, बल्कि इसलिए पूछ रही थी क्योंकि उसे सचमुच समझ नहीं आ रहा था कि मैं ऐसा क्यों हूँ. वैसे भी किसी भी औरत के लिए आसान नहीं होता ये सुनना कि उसके पति को औरतों की तरह सजना पसंद है. और ये मेरी पत्नी के लिए भी आसान न था.

“इतनी आसानी से तुम्हे कैसे समझा दू तनु? मुझे तो पता भी नहीं कि मैं तुम्हे कभी इसे पूरी तरह समझा सकूंग.”, मैं सच ही तो कह रहा था. “शायद इस बात को तुम्हे समझने में कई दिन और महीने लग जाए. और फिर मैं तुमसे उम्मीद भी नहीं करता कि तुम आज ही इसे समझ जाओ. पर जब तक तुम मुझे अच्छी तरह समझ नहीं लेती, मुझे कोई जल्दी भी नहीं है.”, मैंने अपनी पत्नी की दुविधा को थोडा कम करने की कोशिश किया और खुद के अन्दर चल रहे द्वन्द को भी कम करना चाहा. पता नहीं तनु को इस बारे में इस वक़्त बताना सही था या नहीं.

“पर मुझे समझाने की एक बार कोशिश तो करो कबीर.”, उसकी आँखों में आंसू थे. मेरी भोली और प्यारी पत्नी की आँखों में आंसू देख कर मेरा दिल भर आया. और अपनी किस्मत पर हँसी भी आ रही थी कि जो बात मैं खुद नहीं समझ सका हूँ उसे ऐसे कैसे समझा दू. दुनिया भर के मेडिकल एक्सपर्ट को भी इस बात का कारण नहीं पता था तो मैं क्या समझाता उसे.

अपनी इसी बेबसी के साथ मैंने उसे गले लगा लिया और उसके बालों पर अपनी उंगलियाँ फेरता हुआ बोला, “ठीक है मैं कोशिश करता हूँ. मुझे पता नहीं कि सचमुच समझा सकूंगा या नहीं.”, मैंने उसे दिलासा दिया, “पर तनु, उससे पहले मुझे तुमसे एक वचन चाहिए.”

मेरी बात सुनका तनु ने मेरा हाथ अपने हाथो में लेकर जैसे मुझे विश्वास दिलाना चाहा कि वो मेरे साथ है और मुझे छोड़ नहीं रही है. “तनु, तुम मुझे ये वचन दो कि तुम मेरे बारे में कोई भी गलत राय नहीं बनाओगी और अपने पति के रूप में मेरी वैसी ही इज्ज़त करती रहोगी जैसे आज के पहले करती थी…. क्योंकि… क्योंकि… यदि मैं तुम्हारी नजरो में गिर गया तो फिर मेरा अस्तित्व ही ख़त्म हो जायेगा.”, मैंने कहा, “… और फिर तनु, चाहे कुछ भी हो जाए तुम ये मत भूलना कि मैं तुमसे बेहद प्यार करता हूँ. चाहे जैसी परिस्थिति आये.”

मेरी बात सुन अपनी आँखों से आंसू पोंछते हुए उसने मुझसे कहा, “मैं वचन देती हूँ कबीर. मैं हमेशा तुम्हारी इज्ज़त करूंगी. मैं तुम्हे सचमुच समझना चाहती हूँ, कबीर.” मैं अपनी भोली पत्नी को देख मुस्कुरा दिया. उसे तो पता भी न था कि ये वचन निभाना कितना कठिन था.

तनु को अब तक मेरे प्यार पर यकीन हुआ हो न हुआ हो, पर उसकी इस बात से मुझे तो यकीन हो गया था कि वो मुझसे बेहद प्यार करती है, वरना ये बात इतनी सहजता से नहीं कह सकती थी वो. मुझे समझने की उसकी चाहत सच में दिल से थी. सच कहूं तो मेरी पत्नी तनु इस वक़्त मुझे बहुत ही परिपक्व और सहनशील औरत लगी. वैसे तो इस बारे में बात करना मेरे लिए भी आसान नहीं था. पर अब कुछ न कुछ कहना तो था ही. ये विषय भी ऐसा था जिसे एक बार छेड़ दिया तो यूँ बाद के लिए छोड़ नहीं जा सकता था.

मैंने तनु की बांहों को अपने हाथो से हाथ लगाया. उसकी बांह उसकी ब्लाउज की एक सुन्दर आस्तीन से सजी हुई थी. और फिर मैंने उससे पूछा, “क्या तुम महसूस कर सकती हो कि कैसे तुम्हारी बांहों में ब्लाउज की फिटिंग चुस्त है? मानो जैसे तुम्हारी त्वचा को वो चूम रही हो.”

तनु ने अपनी बांह की ओर देखा. ये सवाल उसके लिए अटपटा सा था. शायद उसने इस तरह कभी सोचा भी न हो. फिर उसने मेरी ओर ऐसी आँखों से देखा जैसे पूछ रही हो, ये कैसा सवाल है? “क्या तुमने ऐसी चुस्त फिटिंग तुमने कभी किसी आदमी के कपड़ो में देखी है?”, मैंने अपने सवाल को थोडा और समझने में उसकी मदद की.

तनु ने ना में अपना सिर हिलाया. और फिर रुक कर कुछ देर सोचने के बाद बोली, “पर फिर साड़ी, स्कर्ट, और सलवार तो ढीली फिटिंग के कपडे भी तो होते है न?” उसकी बात में तर्क था.

“हाँ. सही कह रही हो तुम. पर तुमने कभी साड़ी या लहंगा चोली की तरह लहराते हुए कपडे लडको पे देखे है?”, मैंने कहा. शायद उसके सवाल का जवाब मैंने कुछ ज्यादा ही जल्दी दे दिया था. पर फिर थोड़ी देर सोचकर मैंने उससे पूछा, “क्या तुम्हे अपनी साड़ी और सलवार का दुपट्टा संभालना अच्छा नहीं लगता?”.

“हाँ. लगता तो है. पर सच कहूं तो पहले मैंने ऐसा कुछ सोची नहीं थी. मेरे लिए तो बस कपडे थे. लहराते या चुस्त.. जैसे भी हो. ” पर पता है तुम्हे? शादी के बाद तुम्हारे सामने जब जब अपनी साड़ी ठीक करती हूँ या फिर अपने पल्लू को संवारती हूँ तो और भी अच्छा लगता है. मुझे ऐसा करते देख तुम्हारी आँखें चमक जाती है न इसलिए!”, वो धीमी सी हँसी हँसते हुए बोली. मैं भी उसके साथ मुस्कुरा दिया. और फिर मैं उसकी ओर देख कर बोला, “जब जब तुम ऐसा कुछ करती हो तो तुम्हे देखकर मुझे भी अच्छा लगता है.” एक सामान्य भारतीय पति की तरह ही सोच थी मेरी भी. अच्छा लगता था अपनी पत्नी को ऐसे देखना.

इस बात के बहाने तनु की मुस्कराहट देखकर मुझे थोड़ी तसल्ली हुई. उसने इस वक़्त अपनी नज़रे झुकाई हुई थी. शायद वो कुछ सोच रही थी. पर जिस तरह वो अपने हाथो की चूड़ियों के साथ खेल रही थी, ऐसा लग रहा था कि उसे अपने दिल की बात कहने में थोडा संकोच हो रहा है.

“वो सब तो ठीक है कबीर पर शादी के पहले ये साड़ी वगेरह संभालना मुझे अच्छा नहीं लगता था. शायद एक कारण ये भी था कि इसकी वजह से आदमियों की अनचाही नज़रे मुझ पर पड़ती थी. और एक कारण अभी भी है. जब मुझे बहुत काम होते है तो ये कपडे संभालते रहना मुझे पसंद नहीं है.. शायद अब तो मुझे दुपट्टा संभालने की आदत हो चुकी है. पर साड़ी संभालना अब भी सिख रही हूँ. मैं जब भी तुम्हारी माँ के साथ किचन में होती थी न, ये साड़ी संभालना मुझे बिलकुल अच्छा नहीं लगता था.”, उसने सोच कर कहा और मैं उसकी बातें सुनता रहा.

“पर कबीर, मैं समझ नहीं पा रही हूँ कि तुम कहना क्या चाहते हो? तुम्हे लड़कियों के कपडे चुस्त फिटिंग की वजह से पसंद है या फिर इसलिए कि वो लहराते भी है?”, तनु ने एक बार फिर मुझे अपने विषय पर लाने के लिए ये सवाल पूछा. मैं जानता था कि उसके लिए ये सवाल पूछना कठिन था जो उसके चेहरे से दिख रहा था. मेरे लिए ये बड़े आश्चर्य की बात होती यदि वो सचमुच जानना चाहती कि मैं लड़कियों के कौनसे कपडे पहनना पसंद करता हूँ. इसलिए मैं बिना जवाब दिए ही सिर्फ मुस्कुरा दिया.

“अच्छा अब एक काम करो. तुम अब अपने मन में ही सोचो कि लड़कियों के कपडे की कितनी वैरायटी होती है, और फिर सोचो कि लडको के पास कितने आप्शन होते है?”, मैं बोला. मेरा सवाल सुन वो छत की ओर ऐसे देखने लगी जैसे सचमुच वो सोच रही हूँ. पर उसे सोचने की ज़रुरत नहीं थी. इस सवाल का जवाब तो बहुत ही साफ़ और सरल था.

“हाँ. लडको के पास बहुत कम आप्शन होते है.”, वो बोली.

“और रंगों के आप्शन?”, मैंने पूछा.

“ह्म्म्म… जो रंग के कपडे लडकियां पहन सकती है वो शायद लडको पर अच्छे नहीं लगेंगे.”, वो एक बार फिर सोचते हुए बोली.

“ठीक है. और फिर हेयरस्टाइल, जेवेलरी, मेकअप, ये सब के आप्शन किसके पास है?”, मैंने उससे आगे पूछा.

“सिर्फ लड़कियों के पास. लड़के तो ये सब कभी नहीं करते है. और मुझे नहीं लगता कि लड़के ये सब करना पहनना पसंद भी करेंगे.”, वो बोली.

“तुम्हे कैसे पता कि लड़के ये सब करना पसंद नहीं करेंगे. आज से कुछ ३०-४० साल पहले तक तो लड़के कानो में कुंडल भी पहनते थे. और उसके पहले राजा महाराजा के ज़माने में जेवेलरी भी पहनते थे और रंग बिरंगे कपडे भी, तब तो लडको के बाल भी लम्बे हुआ करते थे … और फिर उसके भी पहले तक तो लड़के और लड़की के कपड़ो में बहुत फर्क भी नहीं होता था.”, मैंने कहा. मेरी ये बात तनु को सचमुच सोचने पर मजबूर कर गयी कि क्यों वो ऐसा सोचती है कि लडको को गहने, हेयर स्टाइल और मेकअप का शौक नहीं हो सकता.

“मुझे लगता है कि ये फर्क इसलिए है क्योंकि लड़कियों को सुन्दर दिखना अच्छा लगता है.”, बहुत ही सच्चाई के साथ तनु ने कहा. पर ये सच्चाई सिर्फ उसकी सच्चाई थी…

“और लडको को सुन्दर दिखना अच्छा नहीं लगता?”, मैंने उससे धीरे से कहा और चुप हो गया. और वो भी चुप हो गयी. शायद उसे धीरे धीरे समझ आ रहा था कि लडको को सुन्दर दिखने का तो किसी ने कभी मौका ही नहीं दिया.

“तुम कहना क्या चाहते हो कबीर?”, कुछ देर चुप रहने के बाद तनु ने मुझसे पूछा. तनु को पता था कि मैं उससे क्या कहना चाह रहा हूँ. पर फिर भी उसके लिए मेरी बात को समझते हुए भी असमझ करना एक मजबूरी थी. क्योंकि ये ऐसी बात थी जो उसके अब तक के सालो के अनुभव को झुठला रही थी.

“ज्यादा कुछ नहीं, तनु. बस इतना ही कह रहा हूँ कि लड़कियों और लडको के कपड़ो में बहुत फर्क होता है.”

एक बार फिर ख़ामोशी हम दोनों के बीच थी. पर अच्छी बात ये थी कि तनु ने अपनी किसी बात से मुझे बुरा महसूस नहीं कराया था.

ये खामोशी हम दोनों के लिए असहनीय होती जा रही थी. और फिर थोड़ी देर बाद उस ख़ामोशी को तोड़ते हुए तनु फिर बोली, “पता है बचपन में मेरा भाई नेल पोलिश और मेहँदी लगाकर बड़ा खुश होता था. जब भी ऐसा कोई मौका आता था वो नेल पोलिश लगवाने मेरी माँ के पास पहुच जाता था. पर अब वो ऐसा कुछ नहीं करता.” और फिर मेरे करीब आकर मेरे हाथो को अपने हाथो में पकड़ा और मेरे सीने से अपना सर लगाकर उसने कहा, “शायद इस सोसाइटी ने उसे ये न सिखाया होता कि ये नेल पोलिश लड़कियों की है लडको की नहीं, तो शायद वो आज भी नेल पोलिश लगाकर खुश होता.”

ऐसा लग रहा था कि शायद तनु मेरे दिल की बात समझ रही थी. फिर भी जो बात सालो से उसे सिखाई गयी है कि लडको को ऐसे रहना चाहिए और लड़कियों को ऐसे… वो बात इतनी आसानी से भुलाई नहीं जा सकती थी. इस वक़्त शायद हम दोनों को सब्र की ज़रुरत है. समय के साथ साथ शायद हम दोनों के बीच की आपसी समझ बढ़ सकेगी, मुझे इस बात का भरोसा हो चला था.

कभी कभी मैं भी सोचता हूँ कि यदि सोसाइटी में लड़के लड़कियों के रहन सहन और पहनावे के आज की तरह नियम न होते तो क्या मैं तब भी इस तरह लड़की के नाम से फेसबुक में प्रोफाइल बनाता?

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यदि आपको कहानी पसंद आई हो, तो अपनी रेटिंग देना न भूले!

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Caption: Mother’s Saree

When a crossdresser wore his mother’s bridal saree.

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Credit:Thank you The woman inside me page for contributing this caption!


English हिंदी


“Oh dear Mom! Why are you getting so angry? Anyway there was no one who would wear your old bridal saree from the time of your wedding. You should be happy that your only son respects and loves your culture so much that he is ready to wear your sarees happily.”

“But son …”

“No but … no if Mom! You better be ready to get me blouses stitched matching your other sarees too. Your daughter has now reached an age when she should wear sarees.”

“Oh God! What should I do about this boy?”

“Mom. I am saying this for the last time. Stop your drama! Now tell me how do I look in your bridal saree?”

“One in a million.”, mom said with a sigh.

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“ओफ्फो माँ! क्यों इतना गुस्सा करती हो? तुम्हारे शादी का जोड़ा वैसे भी कोई पहनने नहीं वाला था. तुम्हे तो खुश होना चाहिए कि तुम्हारा एकलौता बेटा अब भी तुम्हारी संस्कृति और तुम्हारी पसंद से इतना प्यार करता है कि वो ख़ुशी ख़ुशी तुम्हारी साड़ियाँ पहनता है.”

“मगर बेटा…”

“अगर मगर कुछ नहीं माँ. अब तो तुम मेरे लिए अपनी दूसरी साड़ियों से मैच करते हुए मेरे नाप के ब्लाउज सिलवाने को तैयार रहो. अब तुम्हारी बेटी जवान हो चुकी है और साड़ी पहनने की उम्र हो गई है उसकी”

“हाय राम! क्या करू मैं अब तेरा?”

“माँ. अब ड्रामा बंद भी करो. सच बताओ तुम्हारी बेटी कैसी लग रही है सुहागन के जोड़े में?”

“लाखो में एक लग रही है.”

सभी कैप्शन पढने के लिए यहाँ क्लिक करे

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चांदी की पायल

हर क्रॉसड्रेसर की इच्छा होती है कि वो दुल्हन की तरह सजे और हाउसवाइफ बने. पर जब बात आती है किसी आदमी की पत्नी बनने की, तब मन में एक दुविधा होती है. इसी दुविधा पर आधारित एक कहानी.

कृपया ऊपर दिए हुए स्टार रेटिंग का उपयोग कर कहानी को रेट करे!

संपादक के विचार: हम नहीं चाहते कि इस कहानी को पढ़कर पाठक समझे कि क्रॉसड्रेसर कहीं से भी किसी भी पुरुष या स्त्री से कमतर है.

नोट: हम क्रॉसड्रेसर की ज़िन्दगी भी बड़ी अजीब होती है. एक तरफ तो हम एक औरत के रूप में दुल्हन की तरह सजने और एक हाउसवाइफ की तरह ज़िन्दगी बिताने के सपने देखती है, और दूसरी तरफ जब सचमुच किसी की पत्नी बनने का सवाल आता है, तो मन में एक झिझक होती है. मन में कई सवाल आते है. ये दुविधा न होती यदि हम तन से औरतें होती, काश…! इसी दुविधा को उकेरने के लिए कई पाठको ने हमें मेसेज भेजे. संयोग से Minal Minu जो कि खुद एक cd admirer है, उन्होंने हमें यह कहानी लिख भेजी जो इन्ही भावनाओं पर आधारित है. तो पढ़ कर हमें बताये क्या आप भी इस कहानी की कोयल की तरह महसूस करती है?

अनुपमा त्रिवेदी

दोस्तों ये दास्तान उस मज़बूरी में छुपी हुई एक औरत की है जो पूरी तरह से औरत तो बनना नहीं चाहती पर उस एहसास को सिर्फ औरत के कपडे पहनने तक सीमित नहीं रखना चाहती! उसको हर उस एहसास से गुजरने का मन होता है जिससे एक स्त्री रोजमर्रा की जिंदगी में गुजरती है। उसे गर्लफ्रेंड भी बनना है…स्कूल गर्ल भी। उसे नर्स भी बनना है और दुल्हन भी। उसे सजते समय कोई कमी भी नही चाहिए। उसे दुल्हन भी बनना है और प्रेग्नेंट होने का एहसास भी चाहिए। उसे भाभी भी बनना है और एक बच्चे को गोद में दूध भी पिलाने का मन है…… ये जो यहाँ वहा घूमता हुआ एक पुरुष के अंदर बैठी नारी का मन है उसी की किस्सा गोई है। काश कि जितना मन करता है उस औरत का, उसका दशांश भी संभव हो पाता! आशा है कि कोयल और मानस की कहानी आपको अच्छी लगेगी|

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Indian Crossdresser Album: Mohini Joshi

A few tips for indian crossdressers taking pictures in their saree and salwars.

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We are proud to feature Mohini Joshi this time. A splendid girl from Maharashtra who loves to wear sarees! Let’s see what we can learn from this pretty woman.

आइये इस बार हम आपके लिए लेकर आये महाराष्ट्र से मोहिनी जोशी की तसवीरें! मोहिनी को साड़ी पहनना अच्छा लगता, और हमें भी! तो देखते है कि मोहिनी की तस्वीरो से हम क्या सिख सकते है!

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Indian Crossdresser Album: Shilpa Rodrigues

A few tips for indian crossdressers taking pictures in their saree and salwars.

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We are proud to feature Shilpa Rodrigues this time. She is truly a lady who loves to sport outfits of all types from sarees to dresses! And we use this opportunity to learn a few things about posing in those outfits as a crossdresser. And there are bonus pictures of her in a bridal gown too!

So, please take a moment to compliment her on her beauty and for contributing her lovely pictures. You can do so by directly sending her a message or by writing a comment on our Facebook page.

Let’s learn from Shilpa Rodrigues what she did correct, and what she did not.

आइये इस बार सीखते है शिल्पा रोड्रिगुएज़ से कि किस तरह हमें पोज़ करना चाहिए!

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